Are You Guilty Of These Dog Mom Shaming Comments?

What can be more unifying than our obsession with these four-legged cuddle machines?  Dog mom life, and the squad you’re grandmothered into, comes with a super inclusive, fun and supportive group of women.  

But in our quest for providing the absolute best quality of life for our pooches, can we inadvertently come off a little dismissive, judgmental or even commit a little Mean Girls style dog mom shaming?

Want to know if you’ve ever Regina George’d another dog mom?  Have you ever said any of these statements —which basically translates as “You can’t sit with us”?

Ew, you feed your dog kibble?  Raw diet is the only way to really care for your dog.

Long gone are the days when picking up any ole bag of dog food at the grocery store will do.  And dogs everywhere are thanking us.  In recent years, tons of information has been shared with pet parents about the sensitivity of canine digestive systems.  We also gotten our hands on loads of nutritional dog feeding information.  So much so that it can be a little bit overwhelming; especially for new dog moms.

But the great thing is, all of this information has given pets and their parents a variety of healthy choices to fit into their lifestyles.  Dogs have never had it so good.  From grain-free designer dog food brands, to home cooked recipes, raw diets and dried jerky snacks, we are serving up yummy meals and treats to our fur kids.

So for the busy working dog mom with a couple of hooman kids to boot, the prepackaged, precooked natural diet services are heaven sent.  For the mom who loves to cook, there are tons of amazing home recipes and cookbooks to fill her kitchen.  And for still others there’s the raw diet (think duck heads, quail eggs, and veggies), scientifically processed brand foods and the list goes on and on.  And yes, that includes kibble.

Whatever diet you choose, what really matters is a full belly and a healthy digestive and immune system.  So consult your vet and let that be that.  I mean it’s not like your dog is complaining.

Deciding which type of dog food to feed your dog is a personal decision

OMG.  She has no control over her animals.  She always has to muzzle her dog.  Ew, she doesn’t even allow people to pet her dogs; how rude.

Okay, okay.  We get it.  You want to pet all the dogs.  Don’t we all.  But this funny little viral meme isn’t practical.  Not all the dogs want YOU to pet them.  Yes I know.  Earth-shattering.  We’ll let that one sink in for a moment.

For one thing, it’s Covid.  So no.  I don’t know when is the last time you washed your hands strange fellow-dog-loving lady or whether you are fully quarantined or not.  So no.  I don’t want you rubbing your potentially cooties-infested hands all over my dog.  He sleeps in the bed with me at night and has an aversion to daily bathes so...well um no.

Okay maybe the delivery is a little harsh but the sentiment is the same.  Covid has changed everything right now.  So give our fellow dog moms a break.  And the dogs too...none of them want daily baths.

But outside of Covid, there are tons of other factors which determine how a dog and it’s owner interact in public.  For one, is the dog still in training?  I know for Paris, she loves people and is very polite in public.  But the twins are another story.

They are fresh from transitioning through at least four different environments; one of which appears to have been a little traumatizing.  So they don’t respond well to strangers coming within 10 to 15 feet of their pack.  Totally throws them into high alert.  So even though they are super cute and super tiny, for now stranger petting is off limits.  Maybe one day but not today.

Also, there are just some dogs who don’t like strangers.  Perhaps they are hyper sensitive or super reactive.  And while muzzles make some people think a dog is out of control or the owner is mean, when I see a muzzle I see a super responsible dog owner safety socializing their dog who is still in training.

So let’s be mindful of the commentary and be respectful of the choices of other dog moms and their dogs.  After all, let’s be honest, not many of us would exactly welcome a couple of randos running up to us to give unsolicited hugs.  Yes, the gesture is sweet and full of love but um...hard pass.

We should not judge dog moms who allow us to pet all the dogs.

I would never get a dog from a breeder.  There are so many dogs in shelters there is no reason not to get a shelter dog.

The war is on puppy mills.  Puppy mills and irresponsible dog breeders.  The war is not on purebred dogs or owners who know that a herding sheep dog would not be a good fit for their tiny matchbox apartment, city-living lifestyle.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with working with a good breeder.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a specific dog breed for your family.  As long as a dog mom is responsible, works with reputable sources and is ready for the life long commitment, more power to her.

Yes, shelter dogs are amazing.  Yes, you can find purebreds at shelters.  Yes, you can puppies as well as housebroken adults in shelters.  But there are other ways to support dog rescues besides adopting.  You can learn about some of those ways in this related blog post here.

But just remember, pet adoption is a personal choice.  And while I can confirm from personal experience that it is amazing, it does have its own set of challenges too.

So here’s the bottom line: there are many different dog mom lifestyles, all of which achieve the same end goal of giving our dogs a long, happy, healthy life.  Every dog placed within a loving forever home, be it from a shelter or a reputable breeder, is a win for dogs.

A responsible dog mom considers her lifestyle when deciding on a dog breed.

 

So let’s be aware of our tone and maybe some of the unconscious biases we may carry when it comes to other dog moms.  Because the only thing more supportive than one loving dog mom is two.